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FOR WHOM THE SIX BELLS TOLL
One major piehead was Jimi Hendrix, and his pie experimentation was already legendary. Constantly in search of a new high, Hendrix had baked pies, fried them, boiled them, smoked them and, on one famous occasion, cooked one on stage. Quite apart from his unique left-handed guitar style, astonishing technique and passionate delivery, Hendrix is generally credited with inventing the first chicken and mushroom combo. But his love for the pie was to be his undoing. One night in a flat in Notting Hill, after bingeing on at least 20 steak and onion pies, 14 pasties and a lukewarm sausage roll, Hendrix fell into a pie-induced coma and choked on a particularly large piece of gristle. "I told him not to mix his pies", said his girlfriend Monica McWalter afterwards, "but he wouldn't listen. He was pie-mad, I tell you".
Events reached a climax when Red headlined the Melton Mowbray Festival in 1977. Guitarist Mark Sullivan was electrocuted on stage while trying to microwave a cheese and onion pie. He forgot to remove the foil wrapping and the resulting explosion shorted out the local substation, leaving the whole of the East Midlands without power. "I don't really remember much about the gig," said Mark some months later. "I was freebasing a lot of vegetables at the time and I should have known better. I was about to strike up the first chord of "Fire", then I woke up in the Burns Unit. Man, what a trip".
"It was a cold day in November and
I was cruising down Acton High Street in the Suzi," says Malcolm,
"when a familiar figure caught my eye. A thin, wiry guy clutching a
white paper bag was coming out of Gregg's. It was Sullivan. I
couldn't believe it. I was sure he'd given up that pie malarkey
years ago. I stopped and we chatted for a while, you know, talking
about the good times. Before I knew it, we'd agreed to put the band
back together! It took a while to track Bob down. The last time I
saw him was on Trisha in an episode entitled 'One foot in the gravy
- my seventies pie hell'.
As for the Six Bells pie, no-one knows exactly what happened to it. Following the departure of Joyce and the temporary closure of the Six Bells in 2010, both pie and cabinet disappeared. Some say the pie retired to the South Coast and now sits in the television room of a B & B in Hastings. Others claim it languishes in the vaults of the Natural History Museum, awaiting categorisation and display. There is even a rumour that NASA now has the pie and is studying it in relation to a possible mission to Venus in 2025, in an attempt to manufacture the ultimate heat-resistant material.
JUST SAY NO RED WILL BE AT THE SIX BELLS IN BRENTFORD ON JUNE 12 2010. THIS WILL BE DAVE'S LAST GIG WITH THE BAND. |
RED
singer Bob Grant has fond memories of both the venue and the
pie. "We did our first gig at the Bells back in the sixties", says
Bob. "Of course, in those days all the bands were interested in was
LSD and free love. Nobody noticed the meat pie which had been newly
installed in the hot cabinet at the end of the bar. I mean, pies
were, like, nowhere, man. Squaresville. You dig?"
Despite
its inauspicious beginnings, word of the pie began to spread through
the London scene. In the late sixties, laws governing pie
sales were strict and the Met came down hard on anyone suspected of
illegal munching. This simply fuelled the underground pie scene
and pie shops - many less than legal -
were springing up all
over Soho. In the summer of '67, as pie
mania gripped London, it
wasn't uncommon to find judges, lawyers and even members of the
Royal Family indulging their habits in some greasy pie joint on Old
Compton Street.
Police raids were commonplace but the evidence
always seemed to disappear before court proceedings could be
instigated.
As the Woodstock generation cut their hair and got jobs with IBM,
glam rock took over. Surely a Sweet or Slade fan would be interested
in a light bite? It wasn't to be. The Six Bells pie remained rooted to the
cabinet. As progressive rock reached its peak, the pub was visited
by Yes frontman Jon Anderson who, having come across the legend of
the ancient pie in one of his dreams, set out on a quest to discover
the mystical snack, meditate with it and then write a triple concept
album about it. Fortunately, due to a lack of drugs and studio time,
Yes settled for a double album about topographic oceans. Far more
sensible.
But
what of Red? They were quick to see which way the wind was blowing.
Songs like "I Only Have Pies For You", ""Crust The Way You Are" and
"More Than A Filling" began to appear in the set. "Yeah, the pie
thing was big." says Bob. "I was doing five or six pasties a day.
Mark Sullivan was into all that Hari Krishna stuff and he started
mainlining samosas. Malc was putting away so many steak bakes that
his skin turned brown. It was
heavy".
The
Thatcher revolution saw a sea change in the nation's eating habits.
The old guard was swept away and in its place came the
sophistication of prawn cocktails, Black Forest gateaux and stew
with bits of fruit in. Just when it seemed the pie was destined to
stay at the Six Bells forever, along came a savoury saviour in the
form of Andrew Lloyd-Webber, composer, impresario and all-round
twat. Passing through Brentford as quickly as possible on his way to
Berkshire, which he owned at the time, Lloyd-Webber's Bentley
suffered a puncture and the superstar was forced to send out for
sustenance. After half-an-hour his driver emerged from the Six Bells
holding aloft ... yes! ... a cheese sandwich and a bag of
dry-roasted. Lloyd-Webber hates pies, apparently. 
After
the Melton Mowbray fiasco, Red had split up amid a sea of acrimony
and brown sauce. Singer Bob Grant finally admitted his addiction and
went into rehab. Mark Sullivan moved to France and started a commune
based on the teachings of Guru Pukka, and Malcolm Tongue started up
a Suzuki van franchise on the North Circular, determined to put his
pie-munching days behind him. But in late 2009, fate took a hand...
But he was clean. We booked some studio
time, cranked up the amps and it was amazing how easily it all came
back." A series of gigs was booked, culminating in a show back at
The Six Bells on June 12. Unfortunately, the pressure of rehearsal
took its toll on Mark Sullivan who, despite his protestations of "I
can handle it", slipped back into his old ways and is now Marketing
Manager for Ginsters. His place has been taken by Dave Heaven, no
stranger to pie territory himself but who has managed to avoid the
excesses of pie culture, preferring the Chinese option instead.
So
remember, people ... it doesn't matter how hungry you are or how
scrumptious that pie on the hot shelf looks ...
Last updated June 14, 2010
